Tough week, positivity

That dieting thing is up and it’s down. Something I’m coming to terms with, I will never have a good diet. They say this kind of change requires dedication, control, and time. Well, I hate it. It makes me unhappy, and the whole point of this experiment is to be happier. I’ve decided that instead of completely changing what I eat, I just need to change how I eat. Portion control will be key to this. We’re already better about eating at home instead of out, it’s just a matter of eating things at home I like rather than forcing myself to eat things I hate because “it’s healthier.”

DIAFscaleThe scale is not cooperating lately and it can just DIAF. So it’s gone up in the last week, but it hasn’t gone up a whole pound so it doesn’t count (granted it’s supposed to go down 2 pounds a week.) Part of this is going to be affected by previously mentioned conditions. I’m not strictly dieting, and I’m in this for endurance and muscle gain. While the scale says I haven’t lost weight, my belt holes tell a different story. (That and the annoying bunching of the waist of my jeans under the belt.)

Now for the really positive: I did barbell squats for real this time. My trainer pointed out that six months ago I had so little balance that I couldn’t get low into a sitting position without falling. Thankfully he had placed a bench beneath me for this very purpose, but to fall onto the bench and not be able to stand back up without help… it was a pretty terrible feeling deep down. Why was I doing this to myself? What was the point? I’m stronger and better than this…

Yesterday morning, I was able to squat, touch the bench, and stand back up with no issues. Three sets of 12. This is a pretty big deal for me. Next step is to do it with weight added O_oimg_1883

Weight in: 182.8 lbs  Jeans are a comfortable size 12 and my t-shirts look amazing.

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